why do i miss her so much? it's driving me insane
and theres nothing i can do to stop it *sigh*

its like banging your head against a wall...it hurts but it feels so good*



*the above statement is hugely subjective, whats good for me may not be good for you

Hey everyone!

just to wish you all a very merry Christmas!
Here's hoping that Santa brings you everything you want, and that if he doesn't, he at least brings you stuff that you are happy with.

Happy Holidays!!!!

-Zac

today, i was in an accident. i had just finished work, had decided with much joy earlier, that i was going to go to JB Hi-Fi to celebrate, drown my sorrows, update my cd collection or just to spend the money that was burning a hole in my wallet...maybe a mixture of all of them, i guess.

anyway, riding my bike, listening to my music (can't for the life of me remember what song ) riding along cranbourne road, happens to be mostly downhill, so i've got just a little bit of speed. riding past a house, a ute just sorta pulls out, not enough time to miss it, so i collide, right into the tailgate of the ute...his entire right tail light is smashed, which i feel pretty bad about, but i came off just a little worse...when we hit, it was the handlebar, that had my hand on it, that went through the tail light, so my hand is all cut up, mostly small superficial cuts, got a real ripper to my palm, even though its mostly just the skin that was sliced off. also, my face smashed into the tailgate, but...really, it was my tooth! that poor tooth got pretty nastily broke...got photos of it luckily my bike is still all in one piece...just a few minor things to fix on it.

so I'm pretty sore, but nothing majorly bad happened, other than my tooth is broken, and i didn't get to spend $100 at JB really i sorta feel more guilty about hitting the ute, and the damage i did, and honestly, the first thing i did was apologize to him also, i feel pretty bad about how much its gonna cost to fix my tooth, but...oh well "merry christmas" huh? *sigh*

i had a pretty good time last weekend, for the most part...

friday night was zappa plays zappa.
dweezil zappa, ray white, steve vai...awesome band. bought a zappa shirt. tour de frank. need to get more music. crappy internet.
3 hour concert. music that's brand new to me. impossible guitar solos. seeing the legend himself. long ride back.

spent the night at a friends house

saturday night, draculas. jenny's birthday. with chris, megan, elliott, zoe and belinda. show was vampirates. comedy galore. hot costumes, awesome waiters and waitresses. needs more chainmaille. not nearly enough vampires, or pirates. good food. not nearly drunk enough very impressive place, great, mindbending layout. cheesy ghost train. somewhat awkward ride back, a bit of excitement with car trouble.

spent the night again

watched harvey birdman, useless lawyer. watched allegro non troppo, somewhat crazy italian take-off of fantasia(?)...interesting though. watched some of a zappa documentary. yes, humor does belong in music. not enough of it, all sex, commercialism, angst etc. pretty warm. a bit awkward. sweaty. sorry.

sunday night - christmas carols at church. got there a little late.

monday, awkward revelation. felt like an ass.

too many short sentences...otherwise, i'm sure this would be long and rambling and...here i go again.
bye

wow...it has been so long since last i came here, and (obviously) longer since i last did a journal entry...

umm...hmmm i really dont know where to start
most people have some thing or other to complain about, or wonderful exciting news to share...me, i never seem to have either, but whether that's due to my boring life or complete indifference, only others can tell.
[edit] can't believe i forgot about this, but i'm seeing zappa plays zappa on the 30th nov...promises to be wonderful, and the company will be excellent
addition to edit... 1st dec is jenny's 18th...which promises to be a 'smashing' good time...those who know will get the pun (hopefully) and now this post is even longer *sighs* [/edit]

exams are finally over (as of last wednesday, which was french, a rather enjoyable exam by the way! (SHOCK)) which means it is time for a few well needed and often longed-for-but-never-practised resolutions

1. Get a decent, or at least new, job. the hungry jacks i work at is useless, being always understaffed due to annoying management and the fact that people get so pissed off about being stressed by the lack of crew on a busy saturday night because the rest are too busy partying to give a shit about the poor crew that are left...HAH! yesterday, it was just me, 2 other crew, and 2 managers, at night. after the other manager left, it was just me on my lonesome, out the back, 'engineering' burgers! absolute pain in the ass, considering we were supposed to have 2 extra crew, we never got our breaks coz we were always busy and we closed 15 minutes late, regardless of the fact that we hadnt had breaks and finally walked out at 12:45, instead of the less than generous 11:30...heh, what do you know, a rant! yay!

2. Get more involved/passionate. This includes spending more time with friends, becoming more interesting, getting some hobbies that i can share with people that wont bore them to tears... this indifference does annoy the hell out of me, but how do i stop? any suggestions?

3. Get in shape. whether this involves hitting the gym with some mates, coworkers or solo, knowing my friends are not the 'gymmie' type much like myself, taking the dog for a walk, or simply harassing the friends to all go to the beach until my back is constantly red, sore and peeling (not a pleasant image) in order to beat last years record of...once? twice? i'm going with once

4. Take better care of myself. Won't go into detail, most of you wouldnt like to know anyway. umm...late addition would be to get some sleep and not to go to bed when i am past tired and on the verge of 'sleeping awake' (love that POD song!)

5. Drive more. this is so that i can actually rack up enough experience so that next year, when i go to uni, i can actually transport myself and therefore not fail through lack of attendance. on the bright side, a medieval re-enactment group operates out of monash uni, clayton, which gives me a good reason to go, and also visit my dad and step mom in glen waverley. ARGH damn american spelling SHIT!!! which sort of leads into 6 and 7... also it means i can go to concerts!

6. Save up money. so that i can buy a car that isnt a "Rolls Canhardly"...sorry, bad joke, if you dont get it or dont know, i might add an explanation, but its pretty lame...also might wanna get a house eventually... i've been working for 2 whole years at my shit job and sadly have only...$700 out of $10,000 to show! man, how depressing but i dont really feel depressed cos i'm too apathetic...cursed indifference

7. Join a medieval re-enactment group. may sound lame, but i like this idea. always had a passion for the "good old-er days"...i wanted to be a blacksmith and make swords and armor and kill/fake kill people with trebuchets and arrows....this could tie in with point 1 and 3, and could lead to a relationship? but i dunno if i'm looking for one there yet. personally, i'd love to just meet another local human that has any sort of creative interest in chainmaille...ah, if only, yes?

8. ...become more creative? this includes creating a personality that not only others will like, but i will rather enjoy too, whether extreme goth or...maybe not overly happy, but someone that doesn't piss people off and get bashed a lot by the *snigger* POPULAR people...although in the case of goth and other like sub-genres i'm willing to make an exception...i'd like to see them beat through my steel-plate armor! hum...this also includes maybe drawing? though i cant see it...also, 3D artwork, and maybe actually having inspiration and software tools to make that a reality. so far, pretty dull on that front.

9. Post more (or less) rants/posts like this, hoping to become more vocal and therefore more popular? i dunno, i'll have to think about this one.

10. something i might consider - growing some sort of facial hair that goes beyond my usual endpoint of trashy stubble, and maybe a haircut every now and then

umm...sorry for the huge long post, i'd say enjoy, but you either are if you're reading this, or you aren't, in which case you won't be reading this